The one downside of marathon training

Besides dead toenails, muscle spasms, limping a lot, being covered in a fine grime of salt and innumerable blisters of course, I must say that one of the downers of running over 30k in a day relates to sex. And how it just really becomes an insurmountable obstacle.
Today for example, our conversation was sort of like this:
Michael: "So what do you want to do now?" Sly wink.
Duder: "Movie?"
Michael: "Yes! That sounds good!"
Duder: "Then maybe some action?"
Michael: "Yeah... yeah, we could do that."
Duder: "I'm really tired."
Michael: "Oh my god, I'm so tired."
Duder: "I'm not sure if I could... maybe later?"
Michael: "Maybe I could just fondle you on the couch while we're watching the movie?"
Duder: "Okay. Let's do that."
Michael: "My hamstrings really hurt."
Duder: "I'm having issues with my inner thigh muscles."
Michael: "The last time? I started having leg spasms."
Duder: "I would probably fall asleep."
Michael: "Maybe we could schedule something for later on in the week."
Duder: "Totally."
And then, when he was in the washroom, I snuck a package of smoked mussels into his jacket pocket. Nothing says "I love you and find you incredibly sexy but can't be intimate with you because I'm afraid of bizarre muscle contractions which could normally be remedied by eating a banana or two but the ones I bought yesterday are still green so it's just not a risk that I'm willing to take at this point" like smoked seafood.